Every so often I check out my junk e-mail folder in case a legitimate message accidentally was sent there (which has happened on occasion). I hate doing this since it makes me weep about the future of humanity as a species.

The latest gimmick is the “undelivered e-mail” that asks you to click a link or attachment that will invariably do bad things to your system. Just for gits and shiggles I did a count of just how many of these bad boys were cluttering up my box among the rest of the trash. The final tally was 32 of 165 spam slices. A few weeks earlier it was the “upgrading your system” where they ask you to send along your username and password for your e-mail account and of course there are the usual questions about your Pay Pal account, that your bank account (where you do not do business) has a problem and asks for sensitive information etc.

Obviously there are enough refugees from natural selection that fall for these things to make it worth their while to continue the spamavaganza.

This just goes to show you that we never truly learn from one of the greatest teachers available to us all–history.

If you’ve ever studied history to any great extent it’s not hard to find common themes, common mistakes and common foibles. I mean, when was the last time teenagers learned from the mistakes of the previous generation of adolescents? Adding to the pathetic hilarity is that the mindset never truly changes: “It will never happen to me.” No matter how many times it happens to so many of their peers each generation feels they are immune from the basic law of cause and effect.

If you ever want to become completely depressed, take a hike through a local cemetery and count the gravestones of those inhumed during their teen years. Oh sure, some fell to the tragedy of illness but a lot of them are there after falling into easily avoidable pitfalls.

The thing is, if it turns out that indeed MLB is found guilty of colluding against Barry Bonds I will admit here and now that my calling it so long ago is no credit to me. I possessed no special insight or genius (as many will no doubt confirm) but what I did have was a pretty solid knowledge of the sport’s history. The actions were familiar, the cast of characters similar, and there was the fact that a lot of antisocial, sociopath, phallucranial, rectally-inclined deviants have worn big league uniforms and the powers-that-be have never been shy about employing them if they thought they could help their team win ball games–public opinion be damned.

The sport also has a long history of collusion and of course Bud Selig has always been more concerned about appearances than reality.

If you get a chance, I would strongly suggest you buy this year’s fall edition of the Hardball Times Annual. I have already seen it (one of the benefits of being on staff) and contained therein is a chapter by Shysterball’s Craig Calcaterra dealing with the Mitchell Report.

Calcaterra’s (of whom I once I had to give a lesson in genetics and how not to produce kittens) take is thought-provoking and quite frankly excellent in its insights. In it he dissects the report but the key point that he develops is this: the report is little more than a bit of Selig-inspired propaganda designed to sell the fans on the idea that the sport is now all but free of anabolic steroids.

The funny thing is–he’s right. While most folks, upon a moment’s reflection, would realize that performance-enhancing drugs are about as far out of baseball as the spitball and anyone who thinks that the scourge of drugs have been erased from MLB also think that no one has “loaded one up” since Burleigh Grimes retired.

However, it’s out of the public consciousness and that’s all that Selig wanted–we shouldn’t be surprised since that is his history as respects various issues. When folks first started having suspicions about steroids, he went into full denial mode to keep up appearances. When it become impossible to ignore or sweep under the rug, he took steps to make it appear that the problem was licked and the Mitchell Report was key to that end.

It matters little to Selig whether performance enhancing drugs are out of the sport or not, so long as the perception is there.

Throw all that history into a hopper and mix well and it seemed pretty obvious that something fishy was going on; a few conversations with well-placed people just added to my suspicions.

However, I’m digressing–this isn’t about that (for a change) I just wanted to go into a little more depth than usual to bolster George Bernard Shaw’s observation that the only thing man learns from history is that man never learns from history. It’s kind of key to today’s discussion.

As you no doubt discerned from the title, I have had an epiphany of sorts: Bud Selig is the new Peter Ueberroth. Initially, it seems absurd, “Ubie” was slick, polished, smooth and dynamic–pretty much the antithesis of Selig; yet their approach to running the sport have astonishing similarities. Indeed during the collusion engineered by Ueberroth he had two staunch allies: Selig (described as a “leading proselytizer” and “enthusiastic ringleader” who to this day denies collusion even occurred) and of course Jerry Reinsdorf both of whom wields the most clout in the sport.

We can see a lot of Ueberroth’s legacy alive and well in Selig.

It was Ueberroth that brought commercialization into the sport–it was under him that the Rolaids Relief Pitcher of the year award came about. He marketed the game relentlessly and added sponsors furiously without much regard to their impact on the perception of the sport much the same way as Selig does today. We recall that it took a significant backlash to end the promotion of the Spiderman movie with webs on the bases.

With both men, they managed to bring a lot of new revenue streams into the game.

While their approaches differed, both commissioners recognized the need to keep the fractious ownership cartel on the same page. Ueberroth used intimidation and the force of his personality while Selig patiently built up consensus and in both cases were largely successful in keeping ranks closed.

Indeed, collusion in the 1980’s was a testament to Ueberroth’s ability to forge a consensus through his relentless hectoring of the owners. Selig’s legacy as to his uniting the owners is having the last two collective bargaining agreements negotiated without a stoppage and in fact, he’s 3-for-3 in that ownership didn’t cave in 1994-95.

Also of note is that each man presided over a major drug scandal and both were very mindful of how history would view their role in it. In each case, it was an issue that wasn’t limited to the sport but was on the national consciousness. Nancy Reagan–wife of then president Ronald Reagan–was the force behind “Just Say No” to recreational drugs (especially cocaine) and George W. Bush used his State of the Union address to call on professional sports to crack down on anabolic steroid use–in both cases usage was described as “epidemic.”

Ueberroth trumpeted himself as the man that got cocaine out of baseball and Selig desperately wishes to be remembered, not as the commissioner that presided over the steroid era, but the commissioner that rescued the sport from it.

Another similarity is that both are relentless in their efforts to keep salaries down. Ueberroth simply came right out and made it clear that he didn’t want teams to spend lavishly on players and put measures in place to make it difficult for owners to open their wallets by doing regular payroll/contract ’review drills’ and ridiculing those that ran afoul of his guidelines.

Selig is more circumspect about it but no less diligent. As Ueberroth had done before him, Selig doesn’t limit himself to those signing the checks but also targets general managers in making reminders about being cautious about spending as he addressed this year’s GM meetings specifically to encourage reticence in off season spending: “He also talked about our economy and how troubling it’s been, and how we have to operate in a fashion that’s cognizant of that economy” according to Jimmie Lee Solomon, executive vice president of baseball operations in the commissioner’s office.

In the case of both men, they do not delude themselves into thinking that their’s is a spiritual office to look after the “best interests of baseball” but rather view the role of commissioner strictly as CEO’s–their job is simply to increase profits by any means possible but generally through relentless marketing, promotion and sponsorships (and in Selig’s case, publicly funded stadiums) and keeping labour costs to an absolute minimum.

While Ueberroth is best known for collusion, it should be noted that under Selig the spectre of collusion has repeatedly materialized. The MLBPA has both filed grievances and made statements about being suspicious about collusive activity. Last year, when Alex Rodriguez opted out his deal with the Yankees the union expressed concern that clubs might collude to keep offers to A-Rod to a minimum and this year there is a grievance filed regarding Barry Bonds is last season’s free agent market.

This really shouldn’t be surprising since Selig was, as mentioned earlier, a major force in the collusion under Ueberroth and it’s doubtful Don Fehr will ever forget that.

Selig has been in baseball since he was the largest public stockholder of the Braves while they were in Milwaukee and has seen the work of every commissioner save Albert “Happy” Chandler and Kenesaw Mountain Landis. It seems of all of them, the one he has used as the template of his commissionership is Peter Ueberroth. It’s an odd choice when you consider that Selig is a lifetime fan of the sport while “Ubie” was probably the least interested in the game on the field.

Regardless, it appears that we have returned to the era of Ueberroth in the stewardship of Allan H. “Bud” Selig.

Best Regards

John